We are having a hard time.
It has been a long , trying month - emotionally , physically, psychologically , financially and situationally EXHAUSTING.
Bug is teething , again. ( has he ever stopped??) He has been nursing non-stop like a newborn for weeks now. Yeouch!
I am anemic , again- still battling the fibroids that continue to make my life hell. Surgery is in my imminent future- yes , i know ALL of the pros and cons and it makes little difference. I am having a partial hysterectomy in the next year - like it or not. Just thinking about this makes me depressed ( more than i already am , if that's possible.)
The housing market back home where i still have my house is in a major slump and is beginning to show signs of neglect which doesn't help its saleability in the least. The pressure of getting it emptied and spruced up so we can unload it is mounting.
A recent trip home made me sad and i miss my family ( crazy as they are ) and my friends and old stomping grounds something awful . Buggy refused to sleep in my house - he was scared and like a fish out of water when bedtime came. I got what felt like zero sleep. It was a tough trip.
On the last day on our way home after an idyllic day at a friend's house and pool we got word that my step-daughter had been admitted to a re-hab facility for eating disorders over the fourth of July weekend. She is stable but having a difficult time accepting this decision.
From joy to devastation in 0-60 - We are stunned at how fast a mood could be ruined these days.
We have been shuttling back and forth to various therapy and doctor appointments since we got back home and we are more than a little rough around the edges. I just feel like crying all of the time , but frankly , i am too tired to muster the energy needed for a good cry just now.
My husband is having a hard time managing his anxiety around all of it, too - the house , the extra mortgage , the baby , our marriage , my health , my step-daughter's health , work , and all of the financial unknowns that loom overhead like some great cloud of locusts in our once clear- blue sky.
I know it has to get better soon , but when ??
There is my honesty .
I have decided to put it out in the open where it can't hurt me . Feels like a good place for it.
