Today i want to write about joy.
Too often in life we find much to complain about. The daily struggles, annoyances, trials, tribulations and problems that are all too easy to obsess and worry about endlessly - and eclipse the joy that would otherwise be found in the spaces that negativity has chosen to fill. I say 'chosen' because i believe we consciously (as well as unconsciously) make choices everyday about our own happiness. I know i do.
I am ashamed to admit that i am less than mindful many times throughout the day - instead my mind is full- a messy cobweb of emotions and neuroses , lists and voices pulling me this way in that - getting in the way of my daily experience of joy.
What is the answer , you ask ?
God, if i know but then again there are hints along the way - if only you keep your eyes and heart open to them.
Watching my baby son grow into himself day by day is a true eye-opener for me.
This weekend i handed Colin a clementine and i watched him palm it lovingly , pinching it carefully between his thumb and forefinger, slowly feeling its dimpled skin. He held it up to his cheek and then closer still to his eye as if he was searching for something inside its flesh. He put it to his tiny mouth and with great concentration , bit into it until it squirted juice all over his chin.
He just looked up and smiled the smile of the Ancients at us- like he discovered the Meaning of the Universe right then and there in that small citrus fruit.
And i think that he did.
He was so utterly joyful in that moment that it brought to mind an old Buddhist teaching i had read years ago on Mindfulness by Thich Naht Hanh. Since i also love to cook ( and eat !) this takes on even more meaning for me.
This is a bit long but i implore you Dear Readers , to take a moment to read and contemplate his oh-so-wise words. If we can all remember to do this even a few minutes of each day what a difference in our lives it would make.
Mindful Eating
Mindful eating is very pleasant. We sit beautifully. We are aware of the people that are sitting around us. We are aware of the food on our plates. This is a deep practice. Each morsel of food is an ambassador from the cosmos. When we pick up a piece of a vegetable, we look at it for half a second. We look mindfully to really recognize the piece of food, the piece of carrot or string bean. We should know that this is a piece of carrot or a string bean. We identify it with our mindfulness: "I know this is a piece of carrot. This is a piece of string bean." It only takes a fraction of a second.
When we are mindful, we recognize what we are picking up. When we put it into our mouth, we know what we are putting into our mouth. When we chew it, we know what we are chewing. It's very simple.
Some of us, while looking at a piece of carrot, can see the whole cosmos in it, can see the sunshine in it, can see the earth in it. It has come from the whole cosmos for our nourishment.
You may like to smile to it before you put it in your mouth. When you chew it, you are aware that you are chewing a piece of carrot. Don't put anything else into your mouth, like your projects, your worries, your fear, just put the carrot in.
And when you chew, chew only the carrot, not your projects or your ideas. You are capable of living in the present moment, in the here and the now. It is simple, but you need some training to just enjoy the piece of carrot. This is a miracle.
I often teach "orange meditation" to my students. We spend time sitting together, each enjoying an orange. Placing the orange on the palm of our hand, we look at it while breathing in and out, so that the orange becomes a reality. If we are not here, totally present, the orange isn't here either.
There are some people who eat an orange but don't really eat it. They eat their sorrow, fear, anger, past, and future. They are not really present, with body and mind united.
When you practice mindful breathing, you become truly present. If you are here, life is also here. The orange is the ambassador of life. When you look at the orange, you discover that it is nothing less than fruit growing, turning yellow, becoming orange, the acid becoming sugar. The orange tree took time to create this masterpiece.
When you are truly here, contemplating the orange, breathing and smiling, the orange becomes a miracle. It is enough to bring you a lot of happiness. You peel the orange, smell it, take a section, and put it in your mouth mindfully, fully aware of the juice on your tongue. This is eating an orange in mindfulness. It makes the miracle of life possible. It makes joy possible.
From my own experience i know being a mother with all of its responsibilities and obligations can distract you from yourself, your life and your joy.
Or it can bring you closer to all three.
Motherhood can be a meditation, too.
So I am trying my best to remember to be more mindful .
I will eat more oranges and remember to find joy in the everyday. And hopefully joy will find me at home more often than not.
